Tuesday 29 September 2009

Meet the Parents

Today Form had 'Progress Review Day' - a chance for me to meet their parents and discuss their lessons. From 8am to 8pm. Ugh.

High points included:
  • conducting a conversation in Slovakian. (I assumed from his furious nodding that M's father understood me perfectly.)
  • slipping into the vernacular in an overt attempt to 'relate' to a kid and his mum while simultaneously covering a lie: "C, the only reason teachers put you into detention is because they give a toss. If you were stupid they wouldn't bother."
  • discussing the ins and outs of a day release clause in the contract of a tutee who has just been signed up by a Championship football side's Youth Academy.

Low points mainly included cringing at my own choice of phrase:
  • "Hi, welcome, do take a seat. Let me get the paperwork out of the way and then we can have a chat."
  • "...you need to buck up your ideas"
  • "...you've made a solid start, but you need to maintain it"
  • "I'm running just a teeny-weeny bit late, sorry."
  • "I'm running just a wee bit late, sorry."
  • "I'm running just a tad late, sorry."
I might as well have been wearing my tweed jacket with leather patches and read from the book of Teaching Clichés.

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